Slack Slacker: Don't Let Corporate Flunky Monkeys Control Your Life

 

Slack Slacker: Don't Let H.R. Flunky Monkeys Control Your Life

In this video, the cool folks at G Plus Animation produced this character, “Veronika,” the ultimate contrarian. She has a way of giving upper management the middle finger with style and wit when combating corporate overreach and unfairness towards the average employee. I think you’ll love this YouTube short as well as their other videos. 

Okay, It’s Story Time: Look Out Below

Since it's Friday, no self-respecting Slacker wants to engage in any form of serious work, so I've always made it my mission to find a way to be absent on that day. Generally speaking, Thursday evening will always be a night for drinking and carousing at my local watering hole, not too far from my workspace. Therefore, in all honesty, I had little energy or motivation to give my employer the attention required to do my job on Fridays.

I always thought I was doing my company a solid by not wasting their time and energy watching me watch the clock. Now, this may sound unfair to the other employees who found themselves picking up the slack for my regular absences at the end of the week. However, I never felt any guilt for this attitude because it was the team that interviewed me that was responsible for hiring a slacker-type character like me in the first place. Was it my fault that it was an employee’s market at the time? Hell No!

And actually, I've never considered my coworkers and colleagues among my favorite buds in life. So, if they didn’t clock me in when I was late or alibied me for my “Fuck off Fridays”, we simply had nothing in common. Besides, most of them were Rat-Bastards anyway. You know types. 

They're the ones running to H.R. spilling the Tea or Beans, if you will, whenever they thought the Cool Guys and Gals weren’t toeing the line or carrying their share of the load in the workplace every minute of the workday. Perhaps it was because the Rat- Bastards were never invited to the Cool Guy and Gals bitching and complaining sessions at our regular Taquila joint on Thursday nights. 

But in all honesty, how could we? It was our time to conspire and plot against the efforts of upper management to increase employee production without increasing compensation. Not that a little extra money was going to improve our motivation, of course. After all, we’re “Slackers.” With Slackers, it’s really not about the money; it’s more about the quality of our lives and work-life balance. And by working hard for anybody but ourselves, our quality of life Sucked, and that life is out of balance.

Bottom line: All kidding aside, in reality, Slackers aren’t “Lazy Losers” as we’re depicted to be. Slackers will do whatever it takes to make a buck as long as whoever we’re working with gives more than a Fuck! End of story.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

End of Summer is Almost Upon Us, and It’s Frightening

End of Summer is Almost Upon Us, and It’s Frightening 😨

 

Labor Day is creeping up fast, so have some laughs before real life starts again. Vacation ends, and it's back to paying attention at work and in school. Phuck! No, Labor Day signals the end of summer. And to a bona fide Slacker, Summer has always signified fun, freedom, lazy daze in the shade, pool parties with pretty girls who could drink and smoke more Tequila and weed than I could. Especially the ones who’d BYOB!

Only employers and flunky office supervisors who love to crack the whip while micro-managing the staff look forward to the end of summer. It sucks. All those who vacationed during the summer months are back and not looking forward to another load of shit shows, office politics, and another wave of sensitivity, diversity training from the In-Human Resource department.

I’m still traumatized every time I see a school bus passing my house, thinking about all the kids hating the driver, whose low-paying job is to deliver them to a living Hell of homework assignments, nasty lunchroom food, boring teachers, and playground bullies. It’s a fucking nightmare that their parents convince them year after year that going back to school every September is a good thing. 

But the kids aren’t stupid. They know their parents can’t wait to pawn their little bastards off on the overworked and underpaid teachers, lunchroom staff, and school bus drivers who more than likely loathe returning to dealing with the madness of another school year.  

If you don’t believe me, click this link. You'll see what American High and Middle schools can do to an impressionable, geek-like, nerdy kid struggling to fit into the cliques roaming the halls and hanging out in the boys’ and girls ' restrooms, waiting to extort the weaker and meeker lames for any cash they may have, while blowing weed smoke in their innocent faces. 

Bottom line: If you’re lucky, you might live to the ripe old age of eighty to eighty-five years. And if you live doing stupid shit like working hard and stressing out, meeting the expectations of others, it’s a good bet you’ll be fucked up and too worn out to enjoy those last golden years. So, my advice to the young people today is my long-held motto. Be a Slacker, Not a Sucker! You’ll live longer, healthier, and happier.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

Slack Slacker Advises: Never Bite the hand that Feeds You

 Got the Munchies? Watch & Read This First!

 

I'm sure you've noticed that I'm inspired by content uploaded on YouTube. And this not only stuck my fancy to no end, but also reminded me of why I prepare my own meals. I always get what I want, when I like it, and how I like it. If someone is particular about how they want something done, they'd be better off doing it themselves. 

Another piece of advice that would be of value when dining out is to always treat the wait staff courteously and tip them generously. In most cases, these employees work hard, under pressure, and for chump change. So, if you give them shit demanding them to return your order to the cook, don't be surprised if that shit is returned.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker😎 

By the way, I wanted to share an excellent recipe for a healthy organic alcoholic beverage you'll love to enjoy on a hot, humid August afternoon. Since I don't have a name for it yet, feel free to name it as you please. 

First, start off with three fingers of organic Tequila. I recommend  

Casa Azul Organic Reposado Tequila

See More Casa Azul

750ml

$69.99

The Tasting Panel

Next, you'll want to purchase some organic fresh mixed fruit from your local supermarket. I generally use strawberries, chopped cantaloupe, chopped honeydew melon, and blueberries. I freeze this mix in a zip-lock plastic bag for 30 minutes and then pour the three fingers over the fruit, allowing it to absorb the Tequila. Give it five minutes and you're good to go. This cocktail looks, tastes, and gives you a pleasant buzz with no regrettable hangover to remember.  

Cheers!

 

The Food Americans Consume Sucks and Nobody Cares, Bon Appétit

The Food Americans Consume Sucks and Nobody Cares, Bon Appétit

Soylent Green 1973 A Movie You Must See 

This Blog Post is Food for thought. So let's start thinking. “We the People” must start thinking about the bullshit fast food, genetically modified meats, and produce that U.S. Corporations and businesses are selling to low-budget Americans every day. Driven to make a buck off people with low incomes, they are knowingly turning them into unhealthy creatures that can’t afford to heal themselves. 

High blood pressure, diabetes, heart issues, and obesity are off the charts in America compared to other Western First World countries. So, “We the People” have to start asking ourselves, Why us? How did those who know better let shit get this bad?

I see people waddling every day to and from work with extended bellies, nearly out of breath, climbing a single flight of stairs, and thoroughly exhausted, barely able to keep from collapsing from the strain before they can start their shift. And in reality, we all know these people won’t last long enough to enjoy any semblance of retirement.   

But the plot thickens. We all see the relentless advertising and marketing campaigns targeting the ignorant amongst us daily. And sadly, the FDA and medical profession are also complicit by not advising the public with vigor. 

Most primary care physicians are miserably when it comes to recommending a dietitian and nutritionist to their patients. In reality, many doctors are simply pill pushers for Big Pharma. With Dietary and nutritional alternatives available that will reverse the horrors of diabetes and high blood pressure without the need for a lifetime prescription of costly medications, American physicians persist in prescribing the profitable status quo.

While everybody knows by now, there are healthy options like organically grown fruits and vegetables, grass-fed beef, and free-range poultry, but we also know most can’t afford the good shit. Budget-conscious households are barely able to keep up with inflation due to the asshole in the White House, who, by the way, is known for scarfing down Big Macs, fries, and sugar-loaded Coke for lunch regularly.

  

Millions of dollars are spent to lure the hungry to unhealthy and unclean choices by marketing specialists and influencers paid to promote food products that other nations refuse to allow their citizens to be exposed to. Standing firm against U.S. corporate lust for profit, many countries will demand U.S. food and drink manufacturers to meet higher standards if they want to market their SHIT to their consumers. Unfortunately, corrupt politicians, lobbyists, and a for-profit healthcare system have sold “We the People” a shit sandwich with a side of greasy fries.

Well, I think I made my point, and I don’t want to beat a dead horse because it’ll probably be on the menu in a burger joint near you sooner than you think.  Bon Appetit.  

Yo, it’s Friday, and I’m due for some chill time. So I’m posting this early and kicking it with some organic Tequalia (take my word for it, there is such a thing) poured over fresh frozen fruit. It’s a Hell of a cocktail on a hot day.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

Slack Slacker’s Sage Advice for those Working on Jobs that Suck!

 

Ultimate Toxic Workplace Compilation – Crazy Boss & Employee Moments

 

Slack Slacker’s Sage Advice for those Working on Jobs that Suck!

Why working for assholes sucks. And let's face it, most managers, supervisors, and the business owners they work for are assholes. Most would agree, it's the rare mid-level employee who gives more than a shit for those forced to work beneath them. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to come off as a disgruntled "associate", a "Donnie Downer" if you will, because as a confirmed Slacker, I never gave a rat's ass for any job, gig, or career I've ever stumbled into.

From day one, I always had an exit strategy and a plan to do the bare minimum for the maximum payout I could extract from my exploitative employers and the stooges they hired to keep an eye on me. Yeah, it was a cat-and-mouse game, and I became adept at playing it early on in my life.

If you're going to play this type of game, you've got to develop a sense of humor because being a good storyteller is always helpful when you need allies to look the other way when you're fucking off, missing deadlines, and production targets. If people like you, it's challenging to discipline you. When you can get coworkers to think and say, “Oh, that’s just Slack being Slack,” you know you've got some who’ll punch your time card when you’re late or leave early.

On the other hand, don't be stupid enough to think a quick line or a slick compliment will always save your ass. You're going to have to save up some "Fuck You money." Fuck you, money is about three to six months of cash to survive on. If the boss decides to say, "pack your shit, "you're fired." Remember, no good time lasts forever. 

So, always be ready to leave with your head held high and your slacker dignity intact. Then go have a few beers/weed on the beach with your comrades, and start thinking about how you're going to make another fast buck without working too hard for it.

Now, in all honesty, this is a young man's game. And a young man with no kids or a clingy woman in your life nagging you to grow up prematurely. That sucks. So if you don’t have a really cool hottie riding shotgun in your life, you’d be wise to stay single. I was lucky, I had a slick childhood chick from my neighborhood to run away with, so she was okay with my outlook on life and consigned my lackadaisical and nonchalant ways. Like work or the rat race of careers, I never took life seriously, because life is not any more serious than it is complicated. To think otherwise is stressful. And stress will kill you faster than cancer. 

Bottom line: As long as you are smart enough to keep your thinking skills as sharp as your ability to persuade people, you always mean well, you’ll always make enough money to live a good life without busting your ass in the process. And if you're not greedy, you’ll find you don't need to get “rich” to be happy. Getting rich takes a lot of hard work, which is antithetical to the Slackers' way of life.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

Slack Slacker Trolling Trump with Receipts from Robert DeNiro

 

Trolling Trump Out Loud! And It’s About Time

Trumping Trump by a genuine gangster of the silver screen.  None other than Robert DeNiro. A tough guy who made his bones in real life as a straight-up guy with the guts to stand up to the biggest punk-ass bully the world has ever known. 

DiNiro, damn near cancel proof in this hyper culturally sensitive era where cowards hide their identities behind keyboards, filters, and avatars, proceeded to eviscerate the so-called President of these United States by accurately predicting Trump’s blatant idiocy and dangerous levels of ignorance will lead America to a future of unimaginable consequences.

This video was as brutal as it was personal, but it was what many in this country have been thinking and saying for a long time. Unfortunately, most regular folks don’t have the power, the platform, or the persona to pull off such a devastating take-down of a global monster like Donald J. Trump.

I want to give a shout-out to the creative talents at US UNFILTERED who posted this entertaining and eye-opening content for those still intoxicated by Trump’s boorish buffoonery.

Bottom line, we’ve got to do better, and time is running out. It’s evident this country is spiraling down a toilet, and we can’t afford a plumber to fix it. And since all Americans of all communities are being negatively impacted by this madness, it’s going to take the unification of all of “We the People” to rise above our differences to save our collective lives.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

Slack Slacker Reasoning: Manager: “Do More!” — Employee: “Pay More!” 🔥

 

Slack Slacker Reasoning: Manager: “Do More!” — Employee: “Pay More!” 🔥

This is filed under: "Don't take no Shit" for those looking for employment opportunities in "conventional" working spaces. Spoiler Alert! Stop! You're a sucker if you continue with these outdated methods of making a living wage in America today. You're leaving yourself exposed to corporate scum bags and scallywags looking for fresh meat to exploit newbies and the desperate for profit. Stick with me, for I'll keep this post short.

These are dark times, and it's anyone's guess how long this drought of fairness, integrity, and prosperity for “We the People” will last. We live in a dog-eat-dog world under this tyrannical dictatorship of the Trump Administration, and you must do unto these dastardly bastards before they do shit unto you.

For the foreseeable future, “We the People” are going to be forced to operate in survival mode. And if it is true, only the strong will survive. Hence, the strong must be smart enough to navigate America’s business landscape of predatory practices designed to extract the most out of their employees while compensating them with as little as they can get away with. 

Low wages, lousy benefits, if any, long, grueling hours, and in many cases, unsafe and hostile working conditions are all many workers have to look forward to daily. Besides that, miserable B.S., you might have some scumbag eager-beaver supervisor or manager cracking the whip to keep production levels moving and profits rolling in to ensure their bonuses. 

If this is an environment you’ve worked in, or still trapped in, then you must embrace the slacker philosophy that sustained me throughout my short but storied work history. From day one, on the down low, don’t give a shit about anything. Not the company, not management, and not your coworkers. Always remember that the idea of the company treating its employees like family is a myth. 

If you’re underpaid and overworked, you don’t owe the business anything. If you’re being paid the bare minimum, then you only do the bare minimum. And when you can get away with it, do even less than the bare minimum. I say fuck that. Being a team player and going above and beyond is for suckers and saps who can be fired for cause and sent packing with security escorting your ass out of the building with the other suckers, looking at you as a cautionary tale.   

Look, the bottom line is this: The term "slacker" has been misconstrued, misunderstood, and maligned for decades. In my view, working hard for any amount of money was a losing proposition. Life is too short, and tomorrow is not guaranteed. And when you’re dead and pushing up daisies, you can’t take shit with you. 

So, I always thought it made sense to find ways to enjoy life, watching the rat race from the bleachers and writing about what I saw. I worked in insurance investigations, wrote for local news publications, and freelanced as a videographer and copywriter for major TV stations in L.A. In doing so, I also had to work with cops, firefighters, and EMTs. Did I make a lot of dough? Hell no, but I never worked a hard day in my life and never got my hands dirty.      

 

I suppose the main takeaway from my advice is my lifelong motto. It’s better to be a Slacker than a Sucker!  

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎

Richard Pryor's Wino & Junkie (Remastered Version)

Before, drug and alcohol addiction were considered diseases; people could call a low-life motherfuckers out for what they were. Well, it's Saturday evening and I've had a few shots ot Tequila, lime juice with some chips, salsa, and guacamole, so I thought I'd share some comedic history just for fun.

Don't worry, nobody got canceled in the days when jokes were jokes.

Slack Slacker

Why the Finish Line Is a Myth | You’re Not Broken, You’re Exhausted #shorts

Got the Munchies? Watch & Read This First!

 

Got the Munchies? Watch & Read This First!

I know, it's Friday and I'm not supposed to be working, writing, offering advice, and commentary. But I was chilling watching some YouTube videos, and this disturbing video caught my attention. The title alone captivated my interest, considering I had a yen for a juicy cheeseburger with a side of fries—something I haven’t done in years. While I may be a slacker, I rarely dine out, preferring to prepare my meals. However 

Much to my chagrin, my appetite was dashed after being enlightened to the fact that lunch at an American fast-food outlet of any brand could cause a catastrophic gastronomic disaster in my under shorts. So, in the interest of the public good, I, Slack Slacker, decided to forgo a Friday of lazy leisure to sound the alarm for those planning to order a corporate "Frankenstein Burger" smothered in onions and lies. 

Double mystery meat patties that would never pass inspection in most countries will be served up to American customers, salivating for a juicy double-decker WTF sandwich to be washed down with super-sized Coke loaded with enough sugar to add inches to the waist, ass, and thighs. Add fries cooked in boiling grease and so heavily salted that your blood pressure will spike higher than your insulin levels from that Coke you guzzled. 

The eight establishments mentioned in this video are as follows: Jack in the Box (Jack in the Crotch) was the joke my college mates called it, primarily due to the sludge that this chain used in their tacos. Wendy’s, supposedly fresh, never frozen, is a lie debunked many times over, especially on the East Coast. Oh yeah, Wendy’s is also known for treating its senior employees like it treats their beef. Like Shit! 

Next up, Checkers and Rally’s were inspected and found to have rodent and insect infestations. Not exactly Yummy! But wait, there’s more. This chain was also cited for broken coolers and raw meat sweating under heat lamps. Still hungry? BTW, these franchises also exploit their employees. So, if you complain about the service, these disgruntled workers might serve you a little special secret sauce on your replacement order with a smile.

Despite what’s been revealed above, there are always those who are still gluttons for more. So, let's have Uber Eats deliver something stomach-churning from Carls Jr. and Hardee’s. Their motto is " go big, go bold, go greasy. And Greasy is right. The oil that their fries are cooked in has been used for over a week. 

According to this video, in the South and Midwest, inspectors found deep fryers filled with thick, blackened oil that was chemically unstable. Not only is this disgusting, but it becomes a delivery system for acrylamide, an acrylamide carcinogen linked to nerve damage and cancer, and hazardous for aging immune systems. Think about it, the fries are this bad, you know the meat must suck!

Now, in the interest of time, I’m going to cut the shit chat and give you the name of the other mentioned burger joint offenders so I can GTFO of Dodge and press my chill mode button. Burger King (Protein Putty Patties), McDonald’s (Quarter Pounder is only 51% beef), and the rest is binders, water retainers, and fillers. Bon Appétit, suckers.

 

White Castle: Sliders is a marketing name for a precooked flash-frozen micro burger covered with dehydrated onion flakes, with holes punched in it to increase profit margins. Sonic: In short, it Sucks all around. Burgers taste like rubberized hockey pucks. Enough said, other than stay away from the high-fructose shakes. Your blood glucose monitor will spike so high you’ll go into shock just reading it.

In my humble opinion, and commentary today is simple. Don’t eat that shit!

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😊

BTW, have you seen the latest photos of Trump's big, fat, unhealthy ass? He's known to "Scarf Down" Big Macs by the garbage bag loads.