Slack Slacker’s Sage Advice for those Working on Jobs that Suck!

 

Ultimate Toxic Workplace Compilation – Crazy Boss & Employee Moments

 

Slack Slacker’s Sage Advice for those Working on Jobs that Suck!

Why working for assholes sucks. And let's face it, most managers, supervisors, and the business owners they work for are assholes. Most would agree, it's the rare mid-level employee who gives more than a shit for those forced to work beneath them. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to come off as a disgruntled "associate", a "Donnie Downer" if you will, because as a confirmed Slacker, I never gave a rat's ass for any job, gig, or career I've ever stumbled into.

From day one, I always had an exit strategy and a plan to do the bare minimum for the maximum payout I could extract from my exploitative employers and the stooges they hired to keep an eye on me. Yeah, it was a cat-and-mouse game, and I became adept at playing it early on in my life.

If you're going to play this type of game, you've got to develop a sense of humor because being a good storyteller is always helpful when you need allies to look the other way when you're fucking off, missing deadlines, and production targets. If people like you, it's challenging to discipline you. When you can get coworkers to think and say, “Oh, that’s just Slack being Slack,” you know you've got some who’ll punch your time card when you’re late or leave early.

On the other hand, don't be stupid enough to think a quick line or a slick compliment will always save your ass. You're going to have to save up some "Fuck You money." Fuck you, money is about three to six months of cash to survive on. If the boss decides to say, "pack your shit, "you're fired." Remember, no good time lasts forever. 

So, always be ready to leave with your head held high and your slacker dignity intact. Then go have a few beers/weed on the beach with your comrades, and start thinking about how you're going to make another fast buck without working too hard for it.

Now, in all honesty, this is a young man's game. And a young man with no kids or a clingy woman in your life nagging you to grow up prematurely. That sucks. So if you don’t have a really cool hottie riding shotgun in your life, you’d be wise to stay single. I was lucky, I had a slick childhood chick from my neighborhood to run away with, so she was okay with my outlook on life and consigned my lackadaisical and nonchalant ways. Like work or the rat race of careers, I never took life seriously, because life is not any more serious than it is complicated. To think otherwise is stressful. And stress will kill you faster than cancer. 

Bottom line: As long as you are smart enough to keep your thinking skills as sharp as your ability to persuade people, you always mean well, you’ll always make enough money to live a good life without busting your ass in the process. And if you're not greedy, you’ll find you don't need to get “rich” to be happy. Getting rich takes a lot of hard work, which is antithetical to the Slackers' way of life.

Lee Bines (aka) Slack Slacker 😎